I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
