About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize