Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
