No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
