he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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