You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
