do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
