After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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