I cockslap morals
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Randomize
