in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
