he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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