Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize