you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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