Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
