i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
