people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
