You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
