my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
there is puke in my bra ... again
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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