If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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