New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
