I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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