You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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