I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
