you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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