we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
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Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
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I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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