is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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