Kiss
Puke
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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