Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
So many bounce houses so little time
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
