he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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