It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
