you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
