Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
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