dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
