So drunk, too bad you don't want this
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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