Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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