Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
