I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize