Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
you will always have a special place in my vag
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Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
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Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
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