Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize