Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize