I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
