Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Randomize
