Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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