i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
