Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
vagina is talking i cant
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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