I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
A bitchslap is in order.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
