I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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