im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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