Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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