well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
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