; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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